Mothers, how many of you can remember your first ideas, dreams, and goals of what motherhood would be about? Can you catch those faint memories of what you imagined being a parent would be like? Some look back fondly and laugh a little, knowing their ideals were not realistic at all. Myself? I will be honest with you, those ideals from the past weigh me down and feed guilt into my heart.

The me of the past thought: My kids will never fight. Never watch tv. And will always say “yes ma’am” with big smiles and cheerful attitudes.

The me of the present knows: My kids DO fight, DO watch tv, and forget to say “yes ma’am” at times. Many times they have cheerful attitudes but sometimes they have downright rotten attitudes.

The me of the past thought: I will always keep a clean house. I will be the perfect homeschooling mother. And I will never raise my voice to my children.

The me of the present knows: The usual state of my house is messy. I struggle with homeschooling and there are times when I just don’t like it. And I raise my voice.

Maybe you can relate. Your ideals may have been drastically different than the ones I listed here but you had ideals nonetheless. Did you find that your goals flew out the window when real life hit?

Friends, this is okay. The truth of the whole matter is that we – you, your husband, and your children, as well as those around you – are all sinners. Those phony people you dreamt up previously? They were perfect people. Perfect people do not exist on this earth and there have never been any, save the Saviour.

There are two ways to deal with the crushing realization that life will not go the way you had planned. The first is how I have dealt with it in the past: let your seeming failures crush you into depression and a sense of giving up. The second is the way God would have you deal with it: run to the Saviour. Cling to Him and acknowledge that your job is working with imperfect, frustrating people in a world that is broken. Take all the burden of perfection off of your shoulders and place it where it rightly belongs: on the shoulders of the King of Kings.

This will free you. Freedom from unrealistic ideals. Freedom from following a pattern of hopes that will never work out because you do not have the ability to follow them. Freedom to allow the Holy Spirit to sanctify you in your imperfection.

“As it is written: There is none righteous, no, not one. . . “ -Romans 3:10

Friends, bow the knee today. Acknowledge that your goals were unrealistic and not biblical. Look at your life now, as messy and dirty and unlikeable as it may seem, see the real, and go from there. Re-work your goals for you and your work so that they acknowledge the necessary saving work of the Savior.

Do you feel weighted down and burdened because your life has not turned out the way you thought it would? Do you desire to work God’s way through your imperfectness?

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